(And just for those who are audio-averse… look, a transcript!)

Yes, I believe in you…
Even when you’re whiny,

And so frustrated and cranky that you can’t stand yourself.

I believe in you.

Even when your disappointment bleeds out onto your desk, getting your keyboard so sticky that the caps lock key refuses to release, and you’re shouting at everybody.

And when that damnable caps lock key, and your own self-sabotage make me want to shake you and yell CUT IT OUT ALREADY, DAMMIT!?

So, Judging By My Emails…

I stirred up a quiet little hornets-nest-of-doubt in more than a few people last week. The culprits? This post about metaphors-gone-amok, and this other one, about murdering-your-darlings.

I apparently left some readers wondering if I meant their metaphors, mascots and witty wordplay were overdone.

Oops.  Sorry about that!  Let’s get this cleared up with a Q&A session, ok?

What’s A (Business) Metaphor?

It’s just a metaphor that’s used in your business… some sort of  symbolic representation or illustration that helps you or your customers better relate to what you’re doing.

I learned about the art of metaphoring from Havi Brooks’s blog, where she’s developed it into an awesome system. She in turn credits Suzette Haden Elgin for it.  But wherever it originated, it’s pure fantabulous for getting past the stuck of formal business terms and structures.

It’s also sometimes an awesome way to make your website or business stand out from the crowd, becoming what Hugh MacLeod calls Social Objects

I’m not very good…

…at toss–the-balls-up-in-the-air-and-catch-them juggling.

Ok, I’m worse than “not very good”;   I can’t do it.

Before you can-do-ologists jump in with encouragement, sure, I know that with enough practice I’d  develop the hand-eye coordination, focus, and discipline required for basic juggling.  But I’m talking about my “right-now skills”, the marketable ones. Theoretically, I could learn to juggle, but practically, you do not want to hire me to entertain at your next party by juggling GeeMa’s china.

It’s ok.   I suck at actual juggling.  You can say it.

I’m rather bad at metaphorical juggling, too. You know, the kind that has to do with balancing various life tasks, skills and projects? The kind of juggling that is *crucial* for a successful freelancer?

Yeah.  I suck at that, too.

Twice last week,Emmit and I scheduled Twitter chats for discussing business models.  Twice last week, Twitter totally fell down on the job! It was a major Tweet-chat fail. So I’m taking the planned chat content, expanding it a bit, and plonking it down here. There’s more than one way to skin a clown, dang nabbit!

The Topic? Business Models.

Ok, first things first… Emmit is a business plan, not a business model.

What’s the difference?

A business plan is like a road-map and itinerary;  it shows you where you’re going, when you plan to get there, a bit of the surrounding terrain, and gives you milestones by which you can track your progress.

A business model is more akin to the vehicle that carries you on that road-trip – or at least, a blueprint for the vehicle.

A while back…

I had a good long whine about missed opportunity, and my failure at bloggy networking  1.0.

As I said then, I was a fairly early reader of some now hugely successful figures in the blog world – specifically, Darren Rowse and Brian Clark.  But I was shy, and intimidated, so I didn’t get to know them.

I read them, recommended them, but rarely interacted, networked with them or took advantage of their audience building promotions, because “it wasn’t my niche.”

This afternoon, I found I’d been recruited for a bit of dictation…

Dear Santa,

Sorry we’re writing so late in December, but The Ring-Mistress has kept us very busy. She isn’t paying overtime, but we mostly like working for her, so it is mostly ok.

We have been Very Good this year, having grown from noting into something. We even earned a little money, though not as much as The Ring-Mistress spent. If you want to put her on the naughty list, we will understand.

But we have been good!!! The elephants and ponies send their love to Rudolf and the other reindeer, and would love it if they could all join us for an act in the off-season. The elves, of course, have already signed up as side-show attractions this summer.  It will be a big hit.

If you already know about #Emmit, you can skip ahead to the last paragraph. But given the number of times “What is an Emmit??” has come up on Twitter, I decided to save us all some sanity and write a simple explanatory post. So. Let’s get on with it, shall we?

What The Hell Is An #Emmit?

Short  Boring Answer #1: “Emmit” is a Twitter inspired name for my creative business plan, which just happens to have a clown nose, circus lights, popcorn and a (soon to be installed) minibar.

Short Boring Answer #2:  #Emmit is a Twitter hash tag for discussing creative non-scary approaches to business and project planning.

Got it?  Good.
Because I hate being boring.
Next question, please?

Why Emmit?

Erm… Why *not* Emmit?

Today, the Monster Counsel is taking a break, and we’re putting the elephants back to work.  Why? We have a new tent that needs putting up.

A sideshow tent.

A special tent.

A *Quirky* tent.

It’s well situated on the carnival grounds, just across from the Sideshow Freaks, next to the  House of Mirrors, and it caters to a very special clientele, indeed.

No no, not the “special” clientele that frequents the  hoochie-coochie show. (What kind of place do you think I’m running here, anyway?).

I mean the REALLY special folks – the ones with dreams, and aspirations, talents, and… well.. quirks.

I call them Quirkipreneurs.

And I think you might just be one.

Yesterday’s post ended on a bit of a cliff-hanger, with everyone huddled together in a Very Important, All Night Monster Counsel [sic](which pretty much seems to mean munching on cookies while wearing meaningful expressions and pointing vaguely at maps.)

The Counsel’s Agenda?

The finding of ways to make Disturbing-The-Spouse or Not-Disturbing-The-Spouse irrelevant to the success and productivity of The Circus. (And Me.) (And my Monsters)

The Counsel was further instructed to be sure that any solutions were pragmatic and self-contained.  In other words?

No plans that require the Spouse to change or otherwise do anything (because that would just Disturb him), nor could the plans require me to engage in any spontaneous spiritual evolution.  I mean, sure, I’m all about evolving, but that’s a life project, and it tends to be a wee bit disruptive on its own.  The focus here is on Things Getting Done, not taking on more stress in hopes of transcending to an angelic state of bliss that’s beyond stress.

First Order of Business?

Anything we know doesn’t work gets sprinkled with powdered sugar and added to the snack table.

I’ve thought a lot about limits over the years.

Just lately, I’ve been focused on how limits apply to creative self-employment:  financial, psychological, physical, time and energy and focus limits. Limits to  push and test, limits best kept surrounded by a “no-fly zone”, limits that keep me from being overwhelmed, limits that, themselves, overwhelm me.

I’ve thought about it so much that there’s a map etched into my skull, revealing estimated locations of limits along with potential bypasses, all clearly marked out with a radioactive green sharpie

It’s pretty cool. Looks  a bit like one of those old-fashioned pirate maps, complete with X marks the spot and dire warnings about being eaten by giant squid.

And while I have yet to encounter any actual giant squid in my life, I have spent a lot of time with what folks these days call “Monsters” – personifications of personal defenses and coping mechanisms that I can talk to, bargain with, and sometimes bribe.

Limits and Monsters have a lot to do with each other.